DBYDADWAY

Family

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ママが軽やかにピアノの演奏を、パパは低いトーンの美声で絵本の読み聞かせを、さらりと自然体でこどもを楽しませるおふたりは、子育ての役割分担がとても明快。「彼女のしつけのポリシーは共感できるので、こどもが叱られている最中はいっさい口を挟まないん ですよ」と和実さん。"そこまで言わなくてもいいんじゃない?" "こんなに泣いているからもうその辺でやめたら?" などどは決して言わず、激しい口調で彼女が叱りのエネルギーを完全に出し切るまでじっと、母娘をそっと見守るのだそう。その代わり、嵐が去った 後は何事もなかったようにさりげなくフォローするのがパパ流の関わり方。「最初の頃は "そんなに厳しくしちゃっても大丈夫なのかな…" と内心では思っていたのですが、私たち夫婦が思う以上に、身の回りなど自分のことは自分でできる子に成長してきているので、 叱り方は決して間違ってはいないのかなと実感しています。幼稚園の授業参観で目の当たりにした娘の凛としたふるまい。そこには"自分の知らない"わが子の成長した姿があったのだそう。

The mom softly plays the piano, while the dad reads a picture book to their children. The two, who entertain the kids in a relaxed, natural manner, have a very clear division of roles in parenting. “Because I can sympathize with her training policy, I never intervene when she needs to talk to our children,” says Kazumi. Never saying anything like, ‘Surely you do not have to say that?’ ‘Because she is crying like this, what about stopping it at that?’ he quietly watches the mother and daughter, keeping silent until she is done. Instead, the dad style of involvement is to smooth things over in a casual manner, as if nothing had happened, after the storm has blown over. “In the beginning, I thought to myself, ‘Is it OK to be so severe?’ However, because she has grown into a child that can handle things in her daily life beyond our expectations as husband and wife, I realize that the way of scolding has never been wrong. On parents’ day in the kindergarten, we could see our daughter behave in a dignified manner. There was the figure of our grown-up daughter that ‘we did not know.’”

お酒とグラス専用のカップボードにワインセラー、カウンターバー仕様のキッチン&ダイニング。某外資系グループ企業に勤務、洋酒ブランドの営業に携わる和実さんならでは、結婚する前から二人で飲みに行くのが大好きというご夫婦らしいインテリア。「今はこども たちが小さいので、昔みたいに妻と外で飲むことができないから、家飲みができるこのスペースはこだわりました」と和実さん。お酒のつまみにとお手製ポップコーン作りはパパの密かな楽しみなのだとか。「炒めたポップコーン豆がふくらんでいく様子やはじける音を、 こどもも面白がりますし、簡単でいろいろな味のアレンジができるから、ハマっていますね。クレイジーソルトやトリュフなど味付けを試行錯誤しています(笑)」。献身的に子育てに専念する時間があると思いきや、おふたりは自分たちの時間も実は大切にしているの でした。「土日のうち、必ず妻もぼくもフリータイムを作ることをルールにしています。半日ぐらい、どちらかがこどもの面倒をみている間、育児から解放されるんですよね。妻が飲みに行って、ぼくがお留守番ということだってありますよ」。

A cupboard for wine and wine glasses, a wine cellar, a kitchen and a dining room with a counter bar. Only Kazumi, who works for a company owned by a foreign capital group and is involved in selling foreign liquor brands, and who has liked going out to drink with Mizuki since before they got married, could have created such a family-like interior. “Now, because the children are small, my wife and I cannot go out to drink as we used to. Therefore, I have taken great pains to create this space, where we can drink at home,” says Kazumi. Is it the dad's secret amusement to make popcorn at home as a snack to go with the drinks? “The kids, too, are amused by the swelling and popping sound of popcorn kernels as they are parched. Because it is easy to make and various flavors can be imparted, I am hooked on it. I like experimenting adding some flavors such as Krazy Mixed-Up Salt, truffle and so on, by trial and error (laughs).” I had expected it to be a time unselfishly devoted to parenting, but it turned out the couple regarded their own time as truly important. “On Saturdays, my wife and I have made it a rule to have spare time without exception. For half a day, while one of us looks after the kids, the other is released from parenting duties. It even happens that my wife goes out to drink and I look after our daughters!”

束ねた棒をくずしたり、倒したりしたら、その人が負け。太さの異なる棒を1本ずつ順番に抜いていくスリリングな遊び。小林一家が全員で夢中になれるお気に入りの木製おもちゃは、ドイツHABA社のスティッキーです。ルールが単純だから、次女のみかちゃんだっ てママ、パパ、お姉ちゃんと一緒にはしゃげるのがポイント。鮮やかな赤、青、黄色の配色もお気に入りで、最近ゲットしたD BY DADWAYのおくるみガーゼストールも迷わずこのカラーリングをセレクト。モモンガのコットンブランケットとともに、みかちゃん のおねんねに大活躍中です。「夜の就寝はもちろん、まだまだお昼寝だって長いから、みかのおやすみどきにいまとても重宝していますね」と美津樹ママ。そして、その寝かしつけがユニーク。眠たいサイン、ぎゃーぎゃーとみかちゃんが泣き始めても、添い寝はせずに ママは彼女をベッドに横たわらせて、ぎゃん泣きにうろたえることなくお部屋を後にします。わめこうが叫ぼうがお構いなし。わが子の泣き声を背中に受けながら、こども部屋を出たママは階段を降りて家事へと意識を振り向ける。赤ちゃんの泣き声はかすかになり、 やがておうちに静寂が訪れる… 。赤ちゃんでも個室で寝かせる、欧米などではごく普通の子育てのワンシーン。そのルーツはママの幼い頃の記憶、想い出にありました。「私の父が幼少期、アメリカで育ったからでしょうか、私たち三人姉弟(美津樹さんは長女)も個室 で寝かされていたんです。だから、ひとりで寝かせること自体にあまり抵抗はないんですよね」。とことん向き合いやさしく楽しく接する一方で、自立を促すためにちょっぴり厳しく、距離を作る。自分の一部のようでもあり、他人でもあるわが子とのコミニュケーショ ンのヒントになりそうですね。

The wooden toy that all the members of the Kobayashi family like so much and are absorbed in is called Zitternix (Keep It Steady), manufactured by the German corporation HABA. It is a thrilling game that the one who collapses a bundle of sticks and makes it fall loses the game. Because the rules are simple, the point is that even Mika, the second daughter, can have a good time playing with her mom, dad, and sister. The color scheme of vivid red, blue and yellow is also a favorite part. Their another favorite thing is gauze swaddling stole by D BY DADWAY, without doubt, picks out this coloring. Together with a cotton blanket that has a pattern of flying squirrels, it is currently playing an active part in getting Mika to go beddy-bye. “It is very convenient in times of putting Mika to sleep, since she still sleeps a lot during a day, not to mention the night,” says Mom Mizuki. Then, her putting to sleep is unique. Although Mika has started crying, a sign that she is sleepy, her mom puts her in bed without lying down with her. Then she leaves the room behind, not flustered by her daughter's crying. She does not care whether her daughter screams or cries. Turning her back on her daughter's crying, the mom leaves the children's room, descends the stairs and turns her attention to household works. The baby's crying becomes faint and finally silence descends on the apartment…. This is a scene of parenting extremely common in America and Europe, where even babies can sleep in their own rooms. It had its roots in the mother's memories and recollections from when she was an infant. “Perhaps because my father grew up in America when he was a child, we three siblings (Mizuki is the eldest), too, were put to sleep in our own rooms. Therefore, there is almost no resistance to being put to sleep alone.” On the one hand, you deal with children in an easy, face-to-face, and pleasant manner, but you have to maintain a distance and be a little strict in order to promote independence. This will be a hint for communication with your child, who is like a part of yourself and at the same time another person.

Jul. 2017


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